Homeopathic Madness

Oh no, she sees me.

“Aren’t you going speak?”

“I’m focusing on my dog, I didn’t see you.”

Yeah, I saw her lanky body walking towards me in a trans.

“I wanna move outta Philadelphia. People are crazy.”  That’s her M.O. always greeting you with a problem.  What’s her name?  I can’t recall it. When describing her to others I say, “I saw that Homeopathic Mad Chick.  So and So’s ex-girlfriend.  You know, the glassy eye chick with locks?”

“Do You still have diabetes?”  she asks, “You can get rid of that, if you stop eating sugar and starch, and take herbs.  I study homeopathic medicine, I know.

“If it’s that simple, then a couple I read about in a New York Times article wouldn’t have gone to jail for denying their child insulin and carbs. Couple claimed administering herbs as a substitute for insulin was all son needed. Anyway, a person with diabetes should limit the amount of certain carbs, not stop eating them,” I said while placing my dog in his cart on wheels. Cocking her head and appearing confused, Mad Chick lists family members with Type 2 diabetes.

“Well, I’m the only person out of five siblings with Type 1 diabetes, and I have two distant relatives with Type 2 diabetes.  One didn’t develop it until age seventy-five.  She was slender, and didn’t smoke or consume alcohol; the other developed it at age sixty and doctors believe the aneurism medication caused it,” I explain.

“But, diabetes is manageable.”

“That’s a matter of opinion.  Explain that to a diabetic that tests blood sugar several times per day, take oral meds, and insulin injections.  Lacking moral support and medical insurance are other issues.  Even if you have insurance, insurance companies aren’t in the business of helping people.  They’re in it for profit.”

“All these diseases are man-made.  My daughter contracted a virus in day care and it took a year for her to get well. I think she it happened from  handling dirty toys, or toddlers not cleaning their hands,” she said while twirling her locks.

“Seems like the work of a dirty daycare. What, you didn’t give her herbs?”

Rolling her eyes, she mumbles, “Yes, I did.”

“Herbs aren’t the solution for every condition. I’m not against taking herbs, I’m just cautious about herbs that might  affect my diabetes.”

“Nooo.  My homeopathic research…”

Tuning her out while focusing on her darting eyes I interject, “Type 1 and 2 diabetes has been in existence since B.C. Gestational, MODY, LADA, and Pre-diabetes are more resent types of diabetes.  Did you know before advanced technology  doctors  tasted  a person’s urine to detect diabetes?”

“That’s nasty.”

“You’re one with nature, you should embrace it?”

Quickly changing the subject Mad Chick rambles, “Everyone needs life insurance.”

“Need and ability to afford is key.  Those with a pre-condition can forget it.”

“That’s not true, you just have to pay a higher premium.  I’m a Life Insurance Adjuster.”

“I don’t know what you adjust, but it depends on the condition.  Life insurance companies might give you accidental death, and that’s tricky as well.  I need to go, and my dog wants to walk.  I’ve been here fifteen minutes too long.”

“What’s your telephone number? I’m going to call you to discuss this further.”

Hmmm, this sounds like a threat. Knowing I didn’t have her telephone number, I respond, “ I’ll call and leave it on your machine.”